Our Made Up Conspiracy Theory of Why We Are Still Part of the Mountain Accord

Last night’s Mountain Accord Q&A was informative. There were a couple of statements made by Andy Beerman and Chris Robinson that made issues clearer. An audience member, we think his name was Clay, asked if Andy Beerman (Park City City Council) and Chris Robinson (Summit County Council) would go back to their respective councils and ensure there wasn’t a train between Brighton and Park City. We are paraphrasing Mr Beerman and Mr Robinson but the response was something like, “We can’t commit to that. It’s on the menu of options but it wouldn’t be our first choice. There will be discussions between now and April. However, by being on Mountain Accord we protect ourselves.”

While we at the Park Rag try not to be completely crazy, we never want to let a good conspiracy theory go to waste. With that in mind, we wish Clay’s question and Andy’s response would have gone something like this:

Clay: Andy Beerman, is Park City going to continue with the Mountain Accord?

Laynee Jones (Mountain Accord Consultant): You don’t have to answer that.

Andy Beerman: I’ll answer the question!

Andy Beerman: You want answers?

Clay: I think I’m entitled to them.

Andy Beerman: You want answers!?!

Clay: I want the truth!

Andy Beerman: You can’t handle the truth!

Andy Beerman: Son, we live in a world with powerful people, and those people have to be placated by other men with power. Who’s gonna do it? You Clay? You, Chris Hague? I have a greater responsibility than you could possibly fathom. You weep for the mountains, and you curse the light rail. You have that luxury. You have the luxury of not knowing what I know. That the Mountain Accord, while tragic, probably saves Park City. And my existence, while grotesque and incomprehensible to you, saves Summit County too. You don’t want the truth because deep down in places you don’t talk about at Rotary Club, you want me on that Accord, you need me on that Accord. We use words like planning, protection, preservation. We use these words as the backbone of a life spent defending something. You use them as a punchline. I have neither the time nor the inclination to explain myself to a man who rises and sleeps under the blanket of the transportation system that I provide, and then questions the manner in which I provide it. I would rather you just said thank you, and went on your way. Otherwise, I suggest you pick up a pick axe and build a tunnel. Either way, I don’t give a damn what you think you are entitled to.